The Doula Scam – Seanna’s Story
Seanna: [00:00:00] The OB sits down on the side of her bed and says, I’m so sorry. There is no pregnancy
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I’m your host Carlin, a Canadian queer identifying 30 something year old, providing a platform for the stories that need to be heard
Good morning, Shauna. How are you?
Seanna: I’m
Carling: Yeah,
Seanna: It’s
Carling: yeah. I know. I feel like I just jumped on this story.
You just posted to TikTok a little. This is gonna [00:01:00] come out way into the future, but as we record you shared a story on TikTok that is now all over TikTok and all over the news.
Seanna: Yeah,
Carling: let’s just jump in. I would love it if you could introduce yourself, and we’ll get into your story.
Seanna: sure. So my name is Shauna. I am a doula, which is non-medical support for pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. There are, like we were talking about before, we rec, hit record there are death doulas as well, and there are doulas for all different types of or. Parts of your life. But I am specifically pregnancy, labor, birth, and postpartum.
Carling: That’s amazing.
Seanna: and I just support people. I don’t do any medical tasks. That’s something that a lot of people are confused about. Doulas and midwives are two separate things. Midwives take care of you medically. Doulas do everything else.
Carling: how long have you been a doula for?
Seanna: Just since August, actually, August,
2022.
Carling: And what made you think one day like, here’s what I need to do.
Seanna: So I’ve always been[00:02:00] not always, since I got pregnant, I have been really into just learning more and wanting to support people. I had a really rough pregnancy and like almost died because of my mental health. Rough pregnancy. I was appalled by the lack of support that I had.
So I have a background in music and I just reached a point where the music industry was just not doing it for me. I’m not cut out for that industry love music, but I just am not into it enough to make myself successful. And so I was like, I need a new career. What can I do? And then I was like why am I not a doula?
Carling: That’s amazing.
Seanna: Oh my gosh, that sounds so perfect. Because I, like I said, I’m so into supporting parents and supporting people through pregnancy. And I was like, oh my God, I could actually do that. That could be the thing that I do. And so I found a training online and
Carling: Yeah. [00:03:00] Did you have a doula through your birth or postpartum?
Seanna: Yes and no. So I was a nanny when I got pregnant, and the person that I nad for is a
Carling: Oh
Seanna: And so I asked her, what do you think of doulas? And she was like, they can be great but do you just want me to come to your birth? And I was like maybe, let me think about it for a minute, but probably, yeah, please, can you do that?
And so I had her as my doula and she did everything that I needed her to do. Looking back, I think I would’ve benefited from an actual trained doula just because I did end up with an emergency cesarean because my baby wouldn’t descend. That might have happened anyway, even if I had a doula.
But she like held all of my anxieties. She took the time to explain things when the nurses were doing 200 other things and just sat with me, and that’s what I really needed her to do.
And that was invaluable support to me.
Carling: I think that’s so beautiful. I think we really [00:04:00] underestimate the need for somebody to just hold that space with you and for you like I said , we interviewed a death doula and just my
own experience going through the death of my dad like that power of holding space. And so I can so easily see how it would translate so beautifully into giving birth.
I’ve been in the room when my sister gave birth and yeah, like just that job of holding. Somebody’s anxiety and worries and just making sure that they are okay.
Seanna: Yeah. And what I said when I was thinking about it is I want someone to be my mom without being my mom. I want someone to hold that mothering role without being my actual mom. I love my mom. I just didn’t want her at my birth. And so I needed somebody there who was experienced, who did know what was going on with my body and maybe might know what was going on in the room and just to tell me like, this is what’s happening.[00:05:00]
It’s all good. Or This is what’s happening. It might not be that great, but we’re gonna get through it and be that comforting presence. so that’s what I wanna be to other people because the nurses and doctors, I’ve only personally been to OB births.
I haven’t been to a midwife birth yet. But sometimes the n nurses and doctors are just so focused on what they have to do, and they have to be focused on what they have to do, that’s their job. But sometimes it’s really valuable to just have someone there to narrate what’s going on, for example, there have been times when um, I should say, birthing person is hemorrhaging and the doctor has to focus on, and the nurses all have to focus on obviously doing life-saving measures.
But to have somebody in your ear just saying, you’re gonna be okay. They’re doing everything they need to be doing. They’re giving you a shot of oxytocin to stop the hemorrhaging. This, this is what’s happening to your body. I’m here, you’re in good care.
Carling: Oh, that gives me goosebumps, like that’s so beautiful. Wow.
Seanna: Thank you.[00:06:00]
Carling: So I had several people send me your first video that that we’re gonna talk about on TikTok. And then somebody tagged me in it and I was like, what is this story? And I was like, how many parts is this? Because I’m always like, I need to know before I get into
Seanna: Oh my God. Yeah.
Carling: But but your story was so wild.
Seanna: Yeah, so where it starts is I became a doula. I started my training and then I started my Instagram page and I had like maybe half a dozen posts on my Instagram page. And I got this DM from somebody saying do you support people outside your area, like outside of your city?
And I looked up where she was and it was about an hour drive away. So I said, yeah, okay, sure. And this was my first client, so I was just so excited to get an inquiry. I was at a family function. I remember telling my aunt and she was so excited for me. and she said that she got this person said that she got pregnant [00:07:00] via sexual assault.
And her mom wasn’t supportive, didn’t believe that she was assaulted, she didn’t have any friends or family she could reach out to. Obviously no partner because it was an assault and I felt so awful for her. And I said, yes, absolutely, I’ll support you.
I don’t remember if I told her if it was my first birth, but I told her that I was in training and she was like, that’s fine. asked her when her due date was, and she told me her due date was on the Monday. This was the Saturday.
And that is unusual for someone to reach out so late. But it wasn’t all it’s not always a red flag, like people do that. also told me that she had trouble finding a doula who was available in her area. She told me she found out really late that she was pregnant. you know, Like it, it added up. it it seemed
Carling: Yeah. Like it tracks.
Mm-hmm.
Seanna: Monday rolls around. I said, because I’m out of town, I can’t help you until Monday. If you go into labor after Monday, I’ll be there. But if it’s [00:08:00] before Monday, I’m sorry I just physically can’t be there. But I could do virtual support. So Monday rolls around and she goes into labor.
And so I go to her house. I arrived at like seven o’clock on
Carling: Like in the morning or at
Seanna: pm on my way to her house. There was a car on fire on the side of the road, and I drove through this like free brainstorm where you couldn’t see 10 feet in front of you. So I was
Carling: like,
the universe
Seanna: I think the
Carling: Shauna, yes. Stop. Don’t go any further.
Seanna: And I ignored the universe. And the universe said, F you.
I just was like, this woman needs me. I’m gonna go through the rainstorm. Like people were pulling over to the side of the road and I was like, I gotta go. And then I get to her house and it’s like clear skies and I was like, that one’s weird.
Carling: Amazing.
Seanna: So anyway, I get it to her house and we just start laboring.
Now it’s very common for a doula to go to someone’s house, to labor with [00:09:00] them before transferring to the hospital. That’s a question that I’ve been getting a lot like. was there no midwife present, et cetera, et cetera? There was, she didn’t have a midwife. She told me that it was an ob birth in the hospital.
Carling: like, she looked pregnant or she looked like you couldn’t tell.
Seanna: I couldn’t tell.
Carling: Right.
Seanna: So because I think it was because the universe was telling me that something was wrong. I was really hoping that when I got there, there would be a very clear baby bump and I just, it was
Carling: Right. And that’s fair. Different bodies like
just carry their pregnancies
Seanna: yeah, exactly. You can’t always tell when there’s a baby, right? she also told me that she had a lot of hospital trauma and so she wanted to wait to go to the hospital until the very last minute, which again, not unusual people do that.
People want to avoid interventions, and so they wait at home as long as possible and go into the hospital when your contractions are three minutes apart so that you’re really close to pushing and they won’t give you
anything, or they won’t [00:10:00] need to suggest anything because you’re already
Carling: Yeah.
Seanna: When we went over her birth preferences, she very much did not want any interventions. She did not want any it’s called Pitocin, that it’s synthetic oxytocin. It helps your contractions get stronger. When you go for an induction, that’s what they give you to start labor.
And again, like Pitocin sucks. It’s necessary sometimes, but like people don’t like it and there’s a good reason for it. Cuz it, it makes your contractions really hurt and have no. In between rest time. And so I, I didn’t question it that she didn’t want any interventions. A lot of people
Carling: And being that you’re in training, do you have a company or a mentor or like somebody that you’re in touch with?
Seanna: yeah. So I’m still actually in training but I have somebody like the person who kind of heads up my training, her name’s Nadine and I can reach out to her through email. I also have a mentor that I knew [00:11:00] personally before I became a doula. And we like got reconnected once I became a doula and she’s been to over 700 births, so she’s a fantastic resource.
So I have been in contact with her. the thing about doula work is, You don’t have to have any training to be a doula because you’re a support person, right? You don’t have to have a lot of knowledge. You just go and rub their back and get them a cold cloth and stuff like that. Like you don’t have to have a lot of knowledge to be a doula.
Obviously most of us want to have that knowledge so that we can better care for our clients. But it wasn’t really unusual for me to go to my first birth without a lot of knowledge. I do also work for a doula agency doing postpartum work. But I don’t do births through them. So I was reaching out to my boss because she’s a birth doula. She was giving me more support than she needed to which was really nice. But I just wanted to say that because I have [00:12:00] also gotten a lot of comments like, your agency should have paid you.
It’s this wasn’t through my agency. They had nothing to do with this. They actually gave me more support than they needed to.
Carling: And so you get there. It’s not glaringly obvious that she’s pregnant, but you assume that she is. And what’s the like vibe
Seanna: yeah. Cuz who would
Carling: Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
Is she actively in labor?
What is she doing?
Seanna: Yeah. she is having contractions every seven or so
minutes. Her contraction pattern is Like unclear. It’s not super regular, but with trauma, that is not unusual,
Carling: Oh.
Seanna: your contractions start and they gradually get closer together and gradually get stronger. If you have trauma, it is not unusual for your contractions to not get closer together. Our bodies have a physiological safety measure in place where if we feel unsafe, labor will stop.
Carling: Interesting.
Seanna: So that gives you your laboring [00:13:00] body an opportunity to get safe before your body continues.
And so I was trying to do all of the things to progress her labor, but it wasn’t really progressing. And I didn’t question her. Like I didn’t question her. I questioned myself as to what I can do to help this happen. But I didn’t question.
And she really didn’t wanna go to the hospital until she was three minutes apart and she never got three minutes apart.
Carling: Yeah. And so she’s laboring, she’s all by herself. What are the parameters of like, what a do, like, how long are you expected to stay there? Because like labor can be days,
Seanna: Yeah. So generally we wanna wait until you’re at the point where you basically like really need support.
Carling: right?
Seanna: if your contractions are long and strong and getting closer together, that’s a pretty good indication that we’re moving along, that is not what happened.
So [00:14:00] I was with her for three days in her home I’ve had people in my comment session be like, yeah, I was in labor for five days. I was in labor for a week. I was in labor for. Like way long time drama that was not out of the ordinary, that was not really questionable.
And I’ve even had people in my common section be like, oh my God, my labor was so long and I was with an abusive partner. Is that why? And I’m like, yeah, maybe like, I can’t say for sure, obviously, but
Carling: so is anybody with her?
Is she, like texting friends for
support
Seanna: it’s just me and her. Her mom lives with her, so her mom gets home from work at one point at some point and just came in and said, hi.
Told her I’m a doula. I’m here to support her through her labor. And she was like, oh, okay. And she would come in every once in a while just to talk, and then she would leave.
Carling: and her daughter just re
remained in character, like in labor the whole time.
Seanna: yeah, she, every time her mom came in the room, she, her labor would stall. She would stop [00:15:00] having contractions, but she told me that her mom makes her really uncomfortable and she doesn’t feel safer around her mom.
So that didn’t raise a red flag. It did kind of, I was like, that’s a little bit weird, but again, this story is so farfetched that, how would I have guessed that?
Carling: And there are like a few like social things that like you should never ask if somebody’s really pregnant. You should never question somebody’s sexual assault allegations. You believe the victim, you believe the person who says it happened,
Seanna: exactly.
Bothers me the most about this is that now I’m a person that questions whether somebody was sexually assault, not everybody. Obviously I want to believe. Victims. But in this particular case, I’m like, I don’t know if she actually was
ever assaulted, maybe she was, and maybe she was assaulted a long time ago and that did a lot of damage to her.
And that’s a contributing factor to what she’s doing right now. It’s not an excuse, but maybe it contributed.
Carling: [00:16:00] Yeah.
Seanna: I hate that. I hate being the person who says that, right?
Carling: Yeah. And so did her water break or did did anything happen?
Seanna: So her water broke on Monday at 10:00 PM I remember it was 10:00 PM cuz you have to take down the time so that you can, after your water breaks, after a certain amount of time, the risk of infection increases.
So she said freaking out of me and I was like, do you think it might be your water? She was like, yeah, I think so. I said, okay, go to the bathroom and clean up. See how much fluid it is. From what she told me, most of it came out when she went to the bathroom which is not totally unusual.
She didn’t change her shorts afterwards though. She said she put a pat on, but she didn’t change her shorts and I thought that was really gross. She was like, no, it’s fine. I was like, yeah, but it’s not though.
But okay. And that was very much the kind of rapport that we had where she would say something and I, in my head would be like, that’s weird, but I outwardly, I’d be like, okay,
Carling: it’s her birth, it’s her experience.
Seanna: [00:17:00] Not what I would do, but who cares what I would
Carling: Yeah. And are you like, is your partner and child at home and just wondering where you are? Like what’s happening?
Seanna: Yeah. So usual for me to be away for 12 hours for a birth. So if my husband’s at work, my parents will take care of my daughter.
If he’s off work, it’s all him. This experience was really hard for my daughter. She was four at the time. She just turned five. I was gone for three bedtimes and three wake ups and all day for three days. And yeah, it was really hard for her. They kept sending me videos of her being like, mommy, I believe in you encouraging stuff. Or like she would go to call the hospital and so I would just like quickly FaceTime my daughter. And it was just really hard to be away from her for that long.
Carling: is really hard. And so why was the woman phoning the hospital?
Seanna: Oh yeah. So water broke and so at that point I was like, okay, so this kind of puts us on a [00:18:00] time clock. I wanted to pre-prepare her that she would Like the time would run out and we would have to go to the hospital. And so it had been like 12 hours since her water broke. So I said, you need to call the hospital.
Like I, I can’t make this call, but I feel as though you need to go to the hospital. So she was going into the other room and having, and making a phone call and faking conversation. And then she would come back and say, they said I could stay home. And she would have a different excuse every time.
She would say they said that it’s 12 hours and then six hours after that. So I have another six hours. And then after six hours I was like, you’re not progressing. And then she would call the hospital and say some make a different excuse.
And then she would call the hospital. And at one point she said, That they told her to stay home because with her labor not progressing. They were gonna want to give her Pitocin. If they give her Pitocin, her contractions [00:19:00] are gonna be really strong and she’s gonna want an epidural and there’s an epidural shortage.
So they don’t want to do that if they can’t give her an epidural. And there was an epidural shortage, that is fact. But that didn’t make any sense because they would just so just stay at home and get an infection. That doesn’t make any sense. So at that point I have it in my contract that after 24 hours with the client, I’m entitled to a break.
And it’s not, I don’t say how long the break is, but I tried to make it just a couple hours kind of thing. So I go for a break on Tuesday and come back and it’s the same old stuff that we’ve been doing. And then I go for another break on Wednesday and then I called the hospital. Cuz at this point my mentor is like, no hospital is saying that to her.
That is not
Carling: Yeah.
Seanna: I called the hospital and the hospital basically said the same thing. They said, I don’t know who would’ve told her that, but she needs to come and get checked if her water’s been broken. Cuz at this point it was 48 [00:20:00] hours. so I chalked it up to this is her hospital trauma.
She’s lying because she has such deep hospital trauma.
So I go back tell her that I think that she needs to go to the hospital and she starts sobbing and through sobs she says, I’m so sorry. I should have told you this before. I don’t know why I didn’t tell you this, but I think I just thought you would abandon me.
And at this point I’m thinking, because the universe is trying to tell me something and I’m thinking, oh my God, she’s gonna tell me that she’s not pregnant. And she says, my assault happened outside this hospital in my town. The one that’s five minutes around the corner happened outside the emergency doors.
And I was like, oh, my heart sank. I said would you go to a different hospital? We don’t have to go to that one. And she stopped on a dime Like it was eerie. I am not recovered from this moment cuz she just stopped, completely changed and looked me dead in the eye, smirked and said, I’ll consider it.
Carling: That just gives
me
goosebumps.
Seanna: like I was not okay, but I [00:21:00] tried to be okay because she had just disclosed this awful thing to me. And so I just looked up what the closest hospital was besides that one it was about a half an hour away. And that’s not unreasonable. I go to the hospital half hour away from my place all the time because it’s better.
And the wait night time isn’t as long. . If you show up in labor, they’re not gonna be like, oh, we’re not the closest to your home. Get outta here. No, they’re gonna treat you because you’re a patient who’s presenting.
Anyways, so she says, okay, we can go. I just need some time. And I was like, okay, you would take your time. But she didn’t do anything with her time like you would think that she would. Try to hype herself up
or listen to her birth affirmations or meditate or have a panic attack maybe.
Right? Like you think she would do something, ha what happened? But she was just laying there and not doing anything and she would still be contracting every five to seven minutes so I was like, no, we need to go. It’s been 48 hours since your water broke. We have [00:22:00] to go.
So doulas are not supposed to drive you to the hospital and that is a boundary that I had in place. I told her I cannot drive you to the hospital.
Carling: Is that like an insurance thing?
Seanna: Yeah. But there was no other way to get to the hospital.
So I said, okay, what if I drive your car? So we get in her car and her car won’t start. point I was like, I need to get this woman medical care, so I don’t have any other choice. So I just drove her to the hospital. And so we get in my car and she starts flipping out she is not okay.
There are actual real tears this time. When she was sobbing on her bed, there were no tears, but she’s actually crying tears this time and she’s like, she’s not okay. she’s saying just. Take me home. Leave me at home. You can f forget I exist. I don’t wanna do this. I don’t wanna go to the hospital, just let me have my baby by myself at my house.
And I was like I can’t do that. I’m sorry. you have no support at all. I am not [00:23:00] taking away the only person that supports you, which is me. Second of all, you are not prepared to free birth in your home. So free birthing is birthing your baby without any medical care. And there are people who do that.
And I don’t have an opinion on that either way, but I just, I’m not the doula to be there for it. Making jokes about free birth oh my God, imagine if I just had my baby on my bed. And I was like, we’re not doing that. . And, she’s in my car and she’s begging me to just leave her at home.
And I’m like I can’t do that. You’re already at risk for an infection because your water’s been broken for 48 hours. I am not leaving you to have your baby at home by yourself with no support whatsoever. And I know you’re not gonna call the hospital
afterwards. She’s really freaking out.
And I started crying at this point cuz I was like I genuinely don’t know what the right thing to do is because as a doula, I never wanna be the person that forces you to do something, especially something you don’t feel safe doing. So I pulled over into [00:24:00] a parking lot, I get out and I said, I am just gonna go call my husband cuz I need another set of ears on this.
So I get out and call my husband he’s pissed, he’s so mad. And he’s like, you need to come home. He’s like, I don’t care what what you do with her. You’re coming home tonight. And I was like, K, that’s not really the advice that I’m wanting. So that’s not the clear head I was looking for.
So I call my mentor. I tell her what’s going on and I say she just so deeply does not wanna go to the hospital. And my mentor says, can I talk to her? So my mentor talks to her, convinces her to go to the hospital. I honestly don’t know how we convinced her to go to the hospital because she probably was genuinely afraid to go at this point because they knew that they were gonna find out that she wasn’t pregnant.
We get to the hospital, I park the car and she won’t get outta my car. She won’t get outta my car. She’s just sitting there and she’s like, I need a minute. And I’m like, and again, I’m like, do something with the minute, [00:25:00] Don’t just sit here and stare at me. I’m like, do you wanna put on some more birth affirmations?
Do you want to meditate? Do you wanna do some deep breathing? Do you wanna cry some more? I don’t know, do something. And she’s no, I just need a
minute. And then I got to the point where I was like, okay.
you don’t get outta my car and go towards that hospital, I’m going to get someone to come and get you. And then she got outta my car and started walking.
Carling: Because I wonder like this whole time you haven’t really slept,
Seanna: no.
Carling: What are you
Seanna: Yeah, like maybe two hours. I’m not sure how I drove to the hospital, to be honest with you.
Carling: So like already your like faculties are down because you’re under slept, you’re so exhausted and you’re like struggling with this moral dilemma. And at any point before this, does anybody say out loud, you or otherwise, or somebody else, do you think she’s faking.
Seanna: My mentor said that to me [00:26:00] because she knew somebody who was like in her church or something who did fake being pregnant. And she said this woman was pregnant for 18 months. And so she was like, I just, something’s off here. Something’s weird. And then that’s when I called.
The hospital, and they told me that she needed to come in. . And then also because I called the hospital and we chalked it up to her having hospital trauma and that’s why she’s lying about calling the hospital.
Like I, I got distracted. And then, like you said, I was sleep deprived and I, I didn’t have all my faculties to say, oh wait, go back to that and think about that some more.
Carling: At any time, do you think I should just call 9 1 1?
I guess
if,
Seanna: threatened to do that several
times,
but it’s, yeah, it wa she wasn’t. In a medical emergency at that point. So I didn’t feel that I needed to call 9 1 1, but I did tell her that if she didn’t start moving, that’s what I was gonna
do.
And so I parked in [00:27:00] sort of the far away parking lot from the emerge doors.
So at most hospitals, you go in through the emergency department and then they let you into the rest of the hospital. So that’s what, where we were going, but it was like a one minute walk or a two minute walk. And she just was taking her sweet ass time, like she was walking so slow and every two steps, she would be like, oh, I’m so shaky is this transition.
And I was like, I don’t know, maybe let’s go and find, go inside and find out. So transition in labor is when you finally dilate to 10 centimeters. And that it is very common to be really shaky. It’s very common to throw up. It’s very common to, even if you had a pretty, I don’t wanna say an easy labor cuz they’re never easy, but if you’ve been coping well, that is the time where it’s very common to say, I can’t do this.
Get me the epidural. And then they won’t give you the epidural at that point. Usually I’ll say something to the effect of, you’ll be [00:28:00] okay, you’re in transition. The baby will be here soon. And I just am really mean, and I don’t let them ask for an epidural. She was asking this like on the way to the, into the hospital and I was like, honestly, I don’t know what’s happening to you right now.
But we need to go inside and get checked and find out what’s going on. So we get just inside. The doors that lead to the rest of the hospital. And she remembers, oh, I have a appointment with my nurse practitioner tomorrow. And that is true.
I saw the card on her fridge. Can I just go see her? Because her whole thing that she was saying you can’t let them touch me. I don’t want them to touch me. I don’t want them to check me. You can’t let them touch me. And so she says, I have an appointment with my nurse practitioner tomorrow.
Can I just go to her? I’m comfortable with her. She’s in pap smears on me. can, I just go to her. And at that point I was like so tired and so frustrated. I was like, okay, let’s go outside and talk. I call my mentor and she says, There’s things that can happen that can mimic [00:29:00] your water breaking that isn’t actually your water.
So maybe her water didn’t break, maybe she just lost her mucus plug in a lot of fluid, but her amniotic sack is still intact. But you’re already there. You’re already at the hospital. Just go inside, get checked. They can check her pad for amniotic fluid. Just go inside. And then she starts she like throws a little girl tantrum almost.
She like, kicks the ground and stomps her foot and goes, nobody gets it. And I look at her and I’m like, you know what? I think that I just need to respect her choice at this point. Because again, that is something that as doulas that we do, we give you all of the information so that you can make a decision and then we trust you to make a decision.
But I was also really worried about liability for myself because. Again, like if it has been 48 hours since her water broke and I leave her at home and her baby dies, is she gonna sue me?
Or just can I live with myself if that happens? [00:30:00] So I call my boss at the agency that I work for, and just asked her like, am I being so stupid right now considering driving her home and leaving her there?
Because at this point, sh her contractions have stopped. She hasn’t had a contraction in half an hour or more. I don’t remember how long it was. And so my boss at the agency dynamic doulas, by the way, shut up. She says no, you’re not being reckless. You’re not being stupid. This is her choice. This has nothing to do with you.
You have to respect her choice. And so I say, okay. Let’s go home. I’ll drop you off. I’ll go home, I’ll get some rest. We’ll be fine. So that’s what I did. We, I drove her home and I, and actually my dad drove my husband to come and pick me up so that I wouldn’t have to drive home because I’ve been sleep deprived for almost three days at this point.
By the way, I was up all night the night before she called me. So that was a stroke of luck on her part that I was already sleep deprived when I got there.
Carling: So [00:31:00] what’s the plan when you leave her? What’s the like She’s gonna have this appointment.
Seanna: Yeah, she’s gonna go to the appointment, the nurse is gonna see if her water broke, and she’ll text me and let me know. And that’s basically the plan, because contractions have stopped at this point. And so we thought it was like prodromal labor. And I said, if your water has broken, please go to the hospital immediately and I’ll meet you there. If it hasn’t, let me know when things do start to pick up and I’m still gonna meet you at the hospital cuz I just, at this point, I can’t do this
again. So I said to her like, talk to your therapist. Talk to whoever you need to talk to, do the work And so she tells me the next day that her water didn’t break, which is true. Her water didn’t
break I’m like, that’s the most truthful thing she said to me this whole time Her water didn’t break. Yeah. And so I said, okay, let me know when when things start to pick up again. I do wanna say, This is the weirdest part of this story. Or the, I guess the most unique part of [00:32:00] this, of my story compared to the other doulas is that her sister got married that Friday. So I was with her Monday to Wednesday.
I had in our like prenatal appointment over the phone, she had told me my sister’s getting married on Friday, so if we can either get this baby out before then or wait until afterwards, that’d be great. And I was like, you can’t really control that. And I certainly can’t
control that.
Carling: that’s not how it
Seanna: Little did I know she actually could control that. So she goes to her sister’s wedding on the Friday without a care, and then she texts me on the Saturday and says that contractions have started again.
Carling: Do you feel hopeful at this point? Do you feel re-energized or are you like, ah, crap.
Seanna: Not even a little bit like, I, I was a little bit hopeful because I knew that I wasn’t going to be in her home anymore, that I was going to be at the hospital with her. And I would help her go into the hospital, but I wasn’t going to be helping convince her that she has to. I [00:33:00] had said I’ll do text support until you’re ready to go into the hospital and then I’ll meet you at the hospital.
So we’re texting and and she’s saying that her, they’re getting closer together. They’re like going to five, six minutes apart. Oh. My mentor also told her to ask her nurse practitioner to teach her how to check her own cervix which is a thing. That they can do. If you are really uncomfortable with vaginal exams or if you live in a rural community and you’re like two hours away from your ob they can teach you how to check yourself so that you don’t waste that time.
Go to the hospital and then they send you home because you’re not, they won’t let you, they won’t admit you till you’re six centimeters. So it’s not like ideal, obviously, cuz I like, we’re not as laypeople, we’re not super practiced at it. Your doula by the way, will never check your cervix. That’s not a thing that we do.
Seanna: So I’m asking her to check herself and she [00:34:00] says she’s at five centimeters. And I say, okay, a little while later, she’s at five and a half she says.
And so I’m like, okay, it’s time for us to go to the hospital. So I get in my car, hook my phone up to Apple CarPlay so that I can talk to her hands free and start driving. And at one point I asked her, how are you getting to the hospital? I’m gonna drive myself. And she says this between very long and strong contractions, right?
She’s having contractions over the phone and she’s saying, oh, I’m just gonna drive myself. And she’s like, I don’t feel safe. I am getting triggered by the pain. and I’m like, you are like the least safe person to drive right now. You are not driving yourself to the hospital. I said can you call an Uber?
Can you call a taxi? Can you call a friend? She’s like, I don’t have any friends with cars. I don’t have the money for a taxi. And I’m like, okay well, I guess the only other option is that I drive you. so again, I broke that boundary for her so I get to her house and I go inside I help her get her bags.
And she’s like ready to go. [00:35:00] There’s no stalling, nothing. I actually said to her like, do you feel ready? And she was like, yes, I’m ready to go. And I looked at her and I was like, that’s the first time I’ve heard you say that. Cause this whole time she’s saying, I’m not ready. I’m not ready. I’m not ready for the baby,
Carling: Is her mom here at this point?
Seanna: Yeah, her mom was there.
Carling: didn’t her mom drive her?
Seanna: Okay. So they did say that her mom was going to drive her when it was to the hospital around the corner, cuz her mom is not legally supposed to drive her car. So I think probably her mom’s not on her insurance or something.
Carling: okay.
Seanna: So they were gonna just like be cheeky and do it when it was five minutes around the corner, but they didn’t feel comfortable with her driving half an hour. But yeah, her mom was there on and off the whole time that I was there. I don’t remember her mom being there when I pick her up on the Saturday, but the whole three days, Monday to Wednesday or whatever, that I was there before her mom was there going to work, coming home.
Carling: That’s so
Seanna: At one point her mom and her actually had a [00:36:00] conversation about how cute the dress was that she had bought for her baby to wear to her sister’s wedding and how it matched so nicely with her dress and how adorable it was and how nice it was gonna be to have a baby at a wedding and how surprised everyone was gonna be.
And then come to find out that her mom knew the whole time that she was lying.
Carling: Oh, Oh God. What?
Seanna: Yeah.
Carling: So you drive an hour to her house?
Seanna: Yeah.
Yep. And then a half an hour to the hospital. And then this is the part that makes me so frustrated, and I just want everyone to know that I did not talk to her this way at the time, but I am mad now and so this is how it’s coming out of my brain. When I believed her, I was much more tender and caring, we get to the hospital and she doesn’t get into my car again. She stays in the car. She turned around so her knees were on the seat and she was hugging the back of the seat on the way to the hospital. She tells me that she thinks her water broke.
Again.
Carling: Do [00:37:00] you
have leather seats?
Seanna: uh, I have like leather covers on my seats, so I was like, it
was fine, I didn’t care. But we get there, she turns around, I get out of the car and go around to the other side, and I like slightly check her pants and they’re bone dry. They’re completely dry. And I’m like, I don’t think your water broke.
And she’s like, no, it did. I’m wearing a pad. And I’m like that in my head I’m like, that wouldn’t matter because it’s so much fluid. But okay, sure. And then she makes this weird face and I said, are you feeling rectal pressure? And for those who don’t know, if you start to feel rectal pressure, that means your baby is coming out.
you are ready to push right now. Your baby is coming out. And so I said, do you feel rectal pressure? And she said she said, maybe. And I said, If you’re feeling rectal pressure, we have to go inside immediately. And she goes, I said, maybe. And I was like, I said if, I am not delivering your baby in my car outside the [00:38:00] hospital.
That’s not what’s happening here. That’s not part of the story. This is not your birth story. Kay. And I said that to her several times. I’m not delivering your baby on the grass. I’m still at the hospital. I’m not delivering your baby on the sidewalk outside the hospital, on the bench, outside the hospital, literally in front of the emerge doors.
And this is not what’s happening. And she’s walking into the hospital at a snails pace. Like, you know, When you ask a four-year-old to go brush their teeth
Carling: Oh yeah.
Seanna: and they walk as slowly as humanly possible, I’m pretty sure she was slower than that. She was moving like one millimeter per step. It was excruciating. And I’m also carrying her bags, so like they’re heavy. And I’m like, I’m not sure if I can carry these anymore. At one point there was a bench and she sat down on the bench and then she kept making the same face and acting like she was feeling rectal pressure. I kept being like, your baby is coming out.
Just go inside. Right? And at one [00:39:00] point I actually threatened to call 9 1 1. I was like, if you don’t get up off of this bench and go inside, I am calling 9 1 1 getting paramedics to bring you inside. And she was like no, don’t do that. And I was like, then get up. know,
Carling: have to,
Seanna: I didn’t say it like that, , I get her inside and then I realize it has taken us an hour to get inside. That was impressive, to be honest with you, that it took her that long. When I think back on it, I’m like, yeah, that was some pretty good acting to to make that take an hour. And again, like she’s a bigger girl.
I wasn’t supporting, I couldn’t support her cause I was holding her bags. It’s not like I could have l lifted her if something went wrong. I was panicking this whole time that cuz she was saying that she was feeling shaky and I was so scared that I was gonna have to leave her there, run inside and get someone . So we get inside. The doors to labor and delivery and they’re locked doors. So I kind of breathe a sigh of [00:40:00] relief that I am no longer the one who is keeping her here.
I can now go back to my role as support person, not person who’s forcing you to be somewhere you don’t wanna be.
we get in, we go through obstetric triage. They hook up a monitor to her and they found a fetal heart rate.
Carling: Like how
Seanna: And
Carling: possible?
Seanna: I know, I so wish that I could be in her head when that happened because What was she thinking?
Like again, I think she’s the luckiest person on the earth cuz how. See you, she couldn’t have faked it. So the suggestion that I’ve gotten a few times is that it was her heart rate. But the problem with that suggestion is that it was a perfect fetal heart rate.
So fetal heart rates are, should be ideally between one 10 and one 70 and highly variable. The number on the screen should change every couple seconds. And it was doing that it was tracking really nicely. And they had no concerns, nothing, they didn’t find anything weird. [00:41:00] And even if they hadn’t found a fetal heart rate, they wouldn’t have questioned that.
Cuz sometimes you just can’t. So I have no idea how there was a fetal heart rate anyways. , We’re waiting for the OB to come in and see her. The OB comes in and then goes, and she has to go to a surgery.
And this woman says to me at 8 24 if nobody’s here by eight 30, I’m leaving. And I checked the time and it’s 8 24 and I was like, nine o’clock. And she goes, 8 45. That’s a good compromise. And I said, no, nine o’clock is the compromise because I don’t want you
Carling: Oh my God.
Seanna: I’m not just going to let her put this time limit on and not tell anybody. So I said, we should call the nurse and let her know that you’re putting a time limit on this. And she wouldn’t press the button to call the nurse.
So I had to press the button, which is just oh my goodness. Ugh, how she’s just so frustrating. Anyways, so the nurse comes in and she tells her and the nurse is like, well, why are you gonna go home And she was [00:42:00] like well, if you’re anxious, you should stay. And she says, if you think your water broke, you should stay. And then she goes, oh I don’t think my water broke actually and I’m sitting there thinking you have been saying that you’ve been feeling a lot of pressure this whole entire time. Like the entire time that you’ve been laboring, you’ve been saying you feel pressure.
So I don’t really buy that. However, she did say that she went to the bathroom and realized she actually wasn’t wearing a pad. And I also didn’t really think that her water had broken, so it was it was like a gray area. I wasn’t really sure what to believe at that point.
Anyway, so the nurse leaves. Eventually the OB comes in with a piece of paper for her to sign because she says that you got imaging done in Hamilton three weeks ago. Do you remember that? And she goes not, not really no she was really confused I thought that was weird.
So the OB comes back with a piece of papers for her to sign so that she can access those records. the OB comes back a little while, later with a bedside [00:43:00] ultrasound. As she’s leaning this woman’s Bed back so she can get better access to her belly for the ultrasound. She says, oh, I’m so nervous.
And I’m thinking like, what are you nervous about? It’s an ultrasound, like the worst that’s gonna happen is you’re gonna see your baby. That’s pretty
cool.
Carling: least invasive part.
Seanna: Yeah it’s like the best part actually. So the OB does this ultrasound and I’m watching the screen cuz there’s still something in my brain going, something’s not right here.
I’m watching the screen, there’s nothing. the OB stops the ultrasound wipes off the gunk belly. And in my head I’m like, why did you stop? You didn’t find a baby yet, obviously like she was supposed to be 41 weeks. At this point you don’t find
the baby like the baby is there. The OB sits down on the side of her bed and says, I’m so sorry. There is no pregnancy and she’s blank faced, but she like sheds a couple tears and the says, the only thing that I see in your [00:44:00] uterus is an I u D. And I’m like, I don’t know how to process this. And at that point I say to myself, okay, I have a decision to make.
Do I want to? Because I, I don’t know what the story is at this point, right? I don’t know if maybe this is a hysterical pregnancy and she believed it. And so now this news means that in her mind, she’s lost a baby. Or was she lying to me this whole time? And if she’s been lying to me this whole time, she deserves to be left at this hospital.
But if she’s just lost a baby, she deserves my compassion.
And so what would I rather be wrong about? So I made the decision that I could live with and I decided to treat her with kindness and take her home. Now, here’s a part that is maybe a little bit petty, but it still makes me bad. She forgot her wallet and I had to pay for parking, and I was really mad about it.
Carling: I, I would be
Seanna: [00:45:00] And yeah, she did pay me back for
parking.
Carling: Okay.
Seanna: Yeah. Anyways they offered to have social work or psychiatry come and talk to her, and she declined. I said, do you want to talk to them about all of that pain that you were feeling? And she was like, no, I just wanna go home.
And so I was like, okay, sure, fine. We’ll just go home. And I offered to send her resources on infant loss and she declined. And I said, okay, go and figure out what you’re gonna tell your mom. Figure out what you’re going to do. Like, Talk to your therapist. Trying to show her as much compassion as I could on the way home.
She barely said anything to me. Like the only thing she said was like two or three times. She just goes, I’m so confused.
So that was basically the end of my time with her. I got home and remembered.
That she had told me that one of the reasons she couldn’t find a doula in her city is because there was a doula that she had some contact with [00:46:00] who was quote unquote shit-talking her to other doulas. She said that this other doula was talking about her and turning everybody else against her so she couldn’t find a doula.
And the ones that didn’t, that she didn’t get to weren’t available anyway, so that’s why she was having such a hard time finding a doula. And so at the time I just thought the doulas in her city were really unprofessional. But then when I got home, I was like, wait a second. Maybe somebody else knows that she’s not pregnant and is telling other doulas.
So I went on Instagram and I just searched for doulas in her city. And it just so happened that the first person I messaged knew who I was talking about. But the thing is, I had such a new profile that she thought this doula thought that I was her. I was this woman. So she goes, I’d actually really rather talk on the phone.
Do you mind? And I was like, absolutely. Like I need to talk about this. Here’s my phone number. You can call me immediately. So she calls me and she’s like, [00:47:00] so what’s the story? And I was like, you’re not gonna believe this. This is what happened. And she was like, oh yeah, I believe it. She did that to me. And with this other doula, she had actually faked a stillbirth.
And here’s the part that is the most angering. So she had told this other doula, That her mom was so unsupportive that when her mom was coming home from work, they had to move to her friend’s house. So she did the same thing to her best friend.
when the doula found out, she didn’t contact the friend cuz she assumed that the friend was in on it.
I have since connected with a friend. She was not in it. In on it. She is traumatized as well. Oviously as you would be. Somebody’s having a stillbirth in your home for a week, right? And then you find out it was fake.
Carling: And how do you,
Like how I have so many questions. How do you fake a stillbirth? Because to fake a stillbirth, there has to be stillbirth.
Seanna: Yeah.
so she did the same thing she did with me. They labored at her home [00:48:00] and when it was time to go to the hospital, the doula went to the hospital with her and the friend stayed home. So the friend from that point on only knew what this woman
Carling: Hmm.
Seanna: the doula obviously didn’t contact the friend afterwards to say this was all fake.
She didn’t know that the friend was not part of it. this other doula had taken her to another hospital in another city and she tried to flee the hospital or she did flee the hospital. so then afterwards, She was just told this doula I’m sorry, I was just really scared and traumatized.
So I ran, but they have me booked for an induction. So this doula actually called the hospital to ask if she was booked for an induction. And they were like, we don’t have anyone by that name today or ever. because she has a really good relationship with the people at those, at the hospital, she asked can you gimme anything about what’s going on without disclosing anything you can’t disclose?
And they said to her she needs help, but it’s not a doula she [00:49:00] needs. And so she read between the lines and said, okay, this was all fake. But she said to me on the phone, she was like, I don’t actually have confirmation of that. I was like I could confirm for you that as of this morning, she is not pregnant and has an I u D, And so I, tried to spread the word in my local doula community and then found out that she had reached out in October. So I was with her end of August and found out in October that she was reaching out to another doula. And I was like, okay, all bets are off. Like you’re not doing the work to not do this to other people.
You’re not doing whatever you’re saying that you’re supposed to do in therapy or with medication or whatever. And so she is a social worker, so I reported her to the College of Social Work who by the way has not done anything and still has not done anything. They have gotten at least 20 reports about this person and has still have not done anything.
She is not under investigation.
Carling: wow.
Seanna: So I am pretty mad about that.
Carling: [00:50:00] Yeah. what was the communication between you and her after you dropped her off at home? Were you staying in touch were you just like, okay here’s my
Seanna: yeah, so I had volunteered to do this pro bono
Carling: Okay.
Seanna: because of her story, because of the story of sexual assault and she didn’t have any support and she couldn’t find a doula, et cetera or whatever. I told her that I was doing it pro bono because I was in training. But that was because I didn’t want her to think that I was pitying her.
I wanted her to feel like I was respecting her, but also offer the support pro bono. So afterwards she texted me later on that day and just said, I’m so sorry, and I had already talked to this other doula at that point. So I said, here’s my email address. You can send me the 1225 that you owe me for parking and anything else your conscience dictates. Take a wild guess how much She sent me
$30. and she said, I’ll send you more when I get paid on the weekend or whatever. But I was like, I’m no, you’re not like, no, you won’t.
Carling: I wanna ask about how [00:51:00] you found out she was arrested,
Seanna: actually. Well,
I found out via the news,
Carling: because it was just recent.
Seanna: Yeah. I was actually outta birth that day and I was, it was wild because I kept finding out about new doulas who had been scammed. By this person. And eventually somebody created a group chat for all of us started contacting the police and wouldn’t let it go.
And the detective actually said that the reason that he actually started investigating is because one of these doulas wouldn’t drop it, wouldn’t let it go. We started this support group for each other. And again, kept collecting doulas, kept finding more doulas, and we were posting on like Facebook groups to warn other doulas, but it just wasn’t enough.
We couldn’t get ahead of her. And then somebody said, I’ve had enough with this. I’m making a TikTok. And then I think I made my TikTok like a day later or so. And I cope through humor. So I made a [00:52:00] serious TikTok and I made a funny TikTok and the funny TikTok led people to my serious
TikTok. And I am overwhelmed by the response. I did not want any virality. I didn’t, it’s cool, but also I can’t open TikTok right now.
Carling: I think the story is so fascinating because it has so many, I mean, well, a few things. I also use humor to laugh at my trauma cuz if I’m not laughing, I’m crying. So I appreciate
that so much. But it just there are so many, just within your story, there are so many victims like she took advantage of the hospital staff of you.
Your daughter was impacted, your husband was impacted, your parents were like there. It’s such a wide net
Seanna: It’s a
Carling: one story.
Seanna: of trauma.
Carling: Yeah. That it
just and I I can only imagine that there is a. [00:53:00] Diagnosed or undiagnosed or untreated mental health issue. Like my most compassionate self just hopes that there’s something really underlying that she needs help, but like also damn, you’ve ruined so much.
Seanna: Yeah. We have collectively, as the victims have had a really hard time with getting the police involved for that reason. And also a lot of us just straight up don’t trust the police. And so getting them involved in this has been really difficult for a lot of us. But nothing else was stopping her. And it’s not about ruining her life, it’s not about getting her punishment. Like we don’t, none of us are feeling glee at the prospect of her rotting in a jail cell. That’s not what this is for us. It’s just she is actively ruining people’s lives once or twice a week.
That’s a Tuesday for her
and she has to stop.
If I could be confident [00:54:00] that there was any other way to get her to stop, I would be fine with
it. If I could be confident that she could sit in her house, on house arrest and not do this to other people, I would be fine with that. If I could be confident that she could be an outpatient somewhere, I would be fine with that.
But I am not confident that anything will get her to stop other than literally taking away all of her access to the internet I just don’t know. I feel like.
I feel like something needs to happen, but I don’t know what it
Carling: Yeah, how have you found continuing on as a doula? You’ve been to other births?
Seanna: Yeah, it’s been difficult because I don’t want to question people. That’s not part of what we do, right? We create a relationship with our clients where they trust us and we trust them, and that’s really important in our work. And so I don’t wanna go into client consults being like, is this person faking it?
But that’s always in the back [00:55:00] of my mind
now, I am determined that her actions will not affect my future clients. Because that’s not
fair. I don’t want her to affect my life so much that it starts affecting other people.
Carling: Right.
Seanna: I don’t wanna give her that power.
And so I am determined to continue with birth work, to continue as a doula, to continue going to births and supporting people because that’s what I wanna do.
And it’s not fair for her to take that from me.
Carling: Yeah. That’s tough. To remain in that work obviously is so important, but yeah, it’s gotta be in the back of your head that like, is this person lying?
Do you know how how long she’s been doing this?
Seanna: So we thought initially that she has started in June of 2022. That was the earliest doula that we had found. However, we have since gotten people reaching out and I, we can’t confirm these stories or not because we don’t know these people. Because those stories viral.
Now people [00:56:00] are like, I’ve got people in my DM saying all kinds of
stuff.
But somebody said that she was, she supported her over a year and a half ago.
Carling: Yeah. And I wonder before this narrative that she has was there something else?
Seanna: Yeah. So I’ve talked to people like her family members who say that she has always been really troubled.
that being said, I’ve also talked to people who knew, supposedly knew her in high school and say that she was a totally normal girl. And then there’s other people who say if you only knew the trauma that she had gone through, you wouldn’t be so harsh on her.
And it’s like, yeah, but did she,
Carling: right. Yeah.
Seanna: I do know a few things because her family has confirmed it. She has a cousin who is an lactation consultant and used to be a doula. So she reached out to her first, like that was her first victim.
And and people have then found her and talked to her about it. And [00:57:00] she’s been trying to play this like interference game where she like then talks to this woman’s mom and tries to get things going. And her mom’s like, oh my gosh, I had no idea. But she says that every single time.
And I do know my mentor spoke with this woman’s mother and told her the full extent of everything that she’s been doing.
And then later that week, there was another doula in their home for five days, and her mother said, not a word. So that’s why I think back to my time and I’m like, yeah, they had a conversation about the baby’s dress, but I don’t believe for a second that was because your mom didn’t believe
her. It was because her mom was playing into her fantasy and maybe her mom doesn’t know what to do, but there are people who do and there are people that you can reach out to for help and you’re not doing that
Carling: Yeah. Oh God. That’s wild. I’m so glad that you guys were able to come together and create a support because how do you process [00:58:00] that? Like it’s so much.
Seanna: there have been people who are like coming in new to the support group from being like, oh my gosh, I can’t believe under, I can’t. Imagine going through this on my own and I’m like, yep, it sucked. It was terrible. Did it for a few months and I think only this week did my body release that trauma, cuz I think I’ve been holding onto it and been trying to be numb to it.
And then all kinds of stuff happened this week and I just shut down. And I remember laying in my bed and just being like, I hate this. I hate feeling like this. and I don’t know what to do to not feel like this. And I don’t know if I wanna cry and I don’t know if I wanna throw up
I don’t know what my body wants to do right now, but it’s awful and I hate it.
Carling: Yeah.
Seanna: Because I have this support group with all of these other doulas now I just messaged them and I said, Hey, could somebody hop on video chat tonight? Cause I’m not doing okay. And then there was [00:59:00] like, probably like eight of us, I think on video chat just talking through everything.
And that helped so much because it helped my brain calm down and understand that yes, she has been to my city since then, but she doesn’t know where I live. yeah, I was in a really unsafe situation. She could have done anything to me,
Carling: Yeah,
Seanna: but I’m not there
anymore And I’m safe, I’m at home.
And so having this support group now has been just immensely helpful.
Carling: That’s amazing. And have you found sharing your story. More publicly. Has that been healing?
Seanna: It’s been interesting because there has been a big outpouring of support there. I wanna say 99% of my comments are along the lines of, oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. Or You seem like you actually would be a really good doula. I wish I’d lived closer to you. That kind of stuff. There’s been a few comments that just don’t know that doulas and midwives are different things.
So they’re saying things like why didn’t you check her cervix?[01:00:00]
I will never check a cervix. I will never palpate a baby. I will never find a fetal heart rate. I’m not trained to do those things, and I won’t be trained to do those things.
Carling: But it is, I think it’s so interesting because if, like when I think of the type of person who would be a doula, and I think you give off this vibe, like you’re empathetic and you’re kind, and you’re patient and you’re compassionate and you are, good at holding space and that’s like ripe for the picken to victimize, right?
Like the, which
Seanna: Yeah. Yeah. And I think that’s why she’s targeting doulas because that’s the type of person that goes into this career. And I was saying too, cuz she is connected with other doulas over different things. Including like being in the l lgbtq community she connected with one doula over the death of a parent and stuff like that.
Oh, she’s also told other doulas that her family thought she should get a abortion and she didn’t want one, and now it’s a stillbirth and they’re saying that she deserved it. And so if you are [01:01:00] passionate about the LGBTQ community and supporting people in that community, if you are passionate about supporting laboring people if you are passionate about supporting victims of sa, supporting people who don’t have a lot of family support, she’s hitting all these boxes, she’s hitting them all, and it.
Takes your guard completely down. And so even when there are red flags, you ignore them or you don’t notice them because you’re so into it. She’s so convincing and so manipulative now looking back, I’m like, okay, yeah, that’s a red flag. That’s a red flag. That’s a red flag.
But at the time, I just was I felt so awful for her that I couldn’t fathom myself then being one of the people that was being bad to her.
I wanted to warn other doulas. I addressed my first video as if you are a doula. And I assumed that people who aren’t doulas or don’t know what doulas are would just scroll [01:02:00] on by. And part of the reason for going on TikTok specifically is because it’s a public platform and because she has victimized people across Canada and into the states, And possibly in the uk.
It needed to be somewhere that wasn’t just about our close community. It needed to be somewhere that would get everybody.
Carling: I hope that maybe through that, I imagine a lot of people didn’t know what a doula was now you know, at least maybe the good side is that more people will understand
the incredible
Seanna: a silver lining with this. Yeah, for sure.
Carling: And do you, I just have this image of you going home. Looking at your husband and being like, she wasn’t pregnant. What was that moment like? Because he and your parents, like they really went through it with you.
Seanna: I can’t remember if I texted or called my husband. I don’t remember telling my husband. But I did it immediately cuz I [01:03:00] just couldn’t, the first person I texted actually was my boss at the doula agency. I was like, Laurie, you’re not gonna believe this. She’s not pregnant. She was like, I’m sorry, what? Like, It was over text, but she was like, pardon me.
Carling: Yeah.
Seanna: cuz she had been supporting me through this whole thing. And then I just was like, she’s not pregnant. So she sent me $30 to Starbucks.
Carling: Oh.
Seanna: And then, so I think I called my husband and I was like, she’s not pregnant. He was like, what?
What? Like, he was speechless and he just said like, how do what? Tell me everything. But I got home and I remember telling my parents, I went downstairs and I told my mom, I was like, so she wasn’t pregnant?
And she was like, what? Like she had a very satisfying reaction
Carling: Yeah.
Seanna: I’m still in disbelief that this even happened.
Carling: My God. And I guess so two things. If somebody’s listening and they’re in Canada and they wanna reach out cuz they need a [01:04:00] doula, where’s the best place for people to reach out to you
Seanna: So simply loved doula on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok. And then simply loved doula gmail.com is my email if you want a consult.
Carling: Awesome.
Seanna: And that’s also like my, website. Simply love doula .
Carling: but only if you’re really pregnant,
Seanna: Yeah, but please. I actually had somebody contact me as a result of seeing my tos, and she’s newly pregnant, and she was I am not going to ask for proof of pregnancy. That doesn’t seem fair to me. But she was like, you can see my test. I took three tests. You can see all of them. You can come to my ultrasound if you want to.
I was like, thank you. That’s not necessary, but thank you. And then I went and met her and she just handed me all her pregnancy tests.
Carling: Oh my God,
Seanna: Yeah, people have asked, how is this changing how you run your business? And it’s it’s not really because this was one person it’s not how I wanna run my business.
If you’re not pregnant, I do have a clause in my contract now cuz I work on a sliding [01:05:00] scale. So I set my sort of price range and you decide what works for your budget.
But I have a line in my contract saying if this contract is entered into under false pretenses, you owe me the full
the full cost.
Carling: I appreciate, like I, I can only imagine since in the last seven days since you posted, you’ve probably had to tell this story so many times and I’m so thankful that you took time outta your Sunday to share it once again.
Seanna: Thank you. I appreciate that. .
Carling: Amazing, thank you so much. I really appreciate this, and yeah, I can’t wait to continue to follow along and see what happens.
Seanna: Thank you for having me on and asking interesting questions
Carling: All right, Shawna. Have a really good day and we’ll talk
Seanna: Thanks. You
too. Bye-Bye.
Carling: Thank you so much for joining me on this episode. I hope you found our conversation informative and entertaining. If you enjoyed this episode, please don’t forget to follow me on social media. Share this podcast with your friends [01:06:00] and leave a review@ratethispodcast.com slash I did not sign up for this.
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I hope you all have a fantastic week ahead and we’ll talk soon
I Did Not Sign Up For This- Podcast 